FEELING BLUE: On the theory that a grand jury could be convinced to indict a ham sandwich, Former Olympic canoeist David Hearn of Bethesda, Maryland has been indicted on a felony charge of vandalism on a claim that he ripped a section of the new blue bottom out of the Lincoln Memorial reflecting pool.

  Hearn, 67, is the first to be charged by the administration claiming vandals rather than poor workmanship were responsible for the failing American Flag Blue coating and the algae infestation at the pool.

  “National Park Service employees observed Hearn actually forcefully and violently pulling up and removing the bottom liner with both hands,”  said Washington’s US Attorney Jeanine Pirro. “According to witnesses, Hearn damaged approximately two square feet of sealant from the bottom of the pool.”

  You have to ask … if the coating was not already failing and coming up, how did Hearn get his fingers around it? 

  Hearn told reporters at the time that he had heard about the blue bottom peeling up and that as the former manufacturer of material for canoes he touched a piece of the blue sealant out of curiosity.

  Pirro claimed that when confronted by park officials Hearn was “belligerent, rude and disrespectful,” which is what Pirro was when playing a judge on television.

  Now, who do you believe?

RED CARD: American soccer fans … not to mention America’s World Cup Team … are outraged by striker Folarin Balogun’s red card ejection from Wednesday night’s match against Bosnia-Herzegovina as well as the next game.

  In a tight struggle for the ball, Balogun was seen accidentally stepping on the ankle of B-H’s Tarik Muharemovic. But the rules of soccer say, “Any player who lunges at an opponent in challenging for the ball from the front, from the side or from behind using one or both legs, with excessive force or endangers the safety of an opponent is guilty of serious foul play.”

  Balugun’s defenders say Argentina’s Lionel Messi, the king of soccer, did pretty much the same thing against Algeria and got away with it.

  By soccer’s rules a red card ban is so severe that Balugun will have to sit in the stands for the US team’s round of 16 game against Belgium.

DANGER ZONE: The temperature hit 100 yesterday in New York City for the first time in 14 years as a dangerous heat dome continues to drift over the east.

  Raleigh, North Carolina set a one day record at 101. Same for Greensboro, at 99, setting a new daily record. Trenton, New Jersey 101, and Philadelphia, 103.

  About 180 million Americans live in areas where dangerous heat is expected. The situation is expected to ease over the weekend.  

INFINITE SCROLL: 

— Following up on President Trump stunning net worth windfall of $2.2 billion during the first year and a half of his current term, The NY Times reports that First Lady Melania Trump also did well.

  The income of the first lady totaled between roughly $17.3 and $18.2 million last year. She took in less than $1 million in 2024, according to federal disclosures.

— The Social Security administration sent out a political message praising Donald Trump, saying “President Donald J. Trump and the Trump Administration are not only protecting Social Security, but we are providing meaningful and immediate relief to older Americans who have spent decades contributing to our nation’s economy.” The email to Social Security recipients says, “Thanks to President Trump, over 35 million American seniors received an average of $7,500 in relief this tax season.”

THE SPIN RACK: A 44-year old security guard was pulled alive yesterday from wreckage in Venezuela, eight days after two massive earthquakes, giving rescuers new hope for finding survivors. Chances generally fade after  72 hours. — While the US puts on a giant 250^th celebration, Iran is staging a massive mourning and funeral display for the late leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, killed in the opening hours of the war with the US. Millions of mourners are expected to take part. — With Russian oil facilities under attack by Iran, Russians are waiting on long lines to fill up their gas tanks, much like the 1970s Arab oil crisis for Americans. Russia is the world third largest oil producer, but they are talking about having to import oil. — About a third of US housing is governed by homeowners associations, often with strict rules about paint colors, foliage, mowing the lawn, and even where you put your garbage cans. One HOA in San Marcos, California, is threatening to fine a resident $100 for displaying the American flag.  

BELOW THE FOLD: In the world of Donald Trump where everything is bigger and better than anybody has ever seen before, tomorrow’s fireworks display in Washington should meet the president’s standards.

  As much as 58,500 pounds of fireworks are ready to be set off. The show will have 850,000 fireworks over 40 minutes, 354 every second. 

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