It’s My Party and I’ll Cry If I Want To: Donald Trump won seven states in the Republican Super Tuesday primaries, putting him firmly on the path to the nomination. Ted Cruz won three states and Marco Rubio, just one race in Minnesota.

Trump, with New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie standing behind him like a loyal wife who didn’t want to be there, said, “I am a unifier. I know people find that a little hard to believe.”

Rubio claims he’s in it to the bitter end, but Super Tuesday was a bitter middle. If he loses in his home state of Florida March 15th, it’s likely to be curtains for America’s first 12-year-old presidential candidate.

Former Candidate Lindsay Graham, who may suddenly have become the most honest Republican alive, said on CBS News that if Trump is his party’s nominee, “We’re going to lose.” He said, “It will tear the party apart.” He went on, “What I see is a demagogue, somebody who has solutions that will never work.”

Those Dull Democrats: Hillary Clinton trounced her Democratic challenger Bernie Sanders, taking seven states to his four. Sanders won his home state Vermont by a resounding 86 percent, as well as Colorado and Minnesota. Clinton picked up 544 new delegates and Sanders, 349.

Jihad: A handwritten will found in the Pakistan hideout of Osama bin Laden says he had $29 million that he wanted to be used for continuing warfare against the West. The US government just released the terrorist leader’s will and other documents. “I hope, for my brothers, sisters, and maternal aunts, to obey my will and to spend all the money that I have left in Sudan on Jihad, for the sake of Allah,” bin Laden wrote.

He also wrote that one of his wives had an electronic tracking chip implanted in her mouth.

Legal News: A lawyer for the Marriott Hotels suggested in court yesterday that the peephole video of Fox football sportscaster Erin Andrews shot at the Nashville Marriott didn’t hurt her career. But the case is about her privacy and dignity, not her career.

In 2009 a stalker asked to be put in the room next to Andrews and filmed her naked through a peephole he cut in the wall. The video has had 17 million views on the Internet.

Andrews filed a $75 million lawsuit claiming the hotel failed to protect her privacy. She testified tearfully Monday about finding out she was naked all over the Internet. Andrews said ESPN, her employer at the time, would not allow her back on the air until she did a television interview about the incident — a further invasion, she testified.

Andrews said the video follows everywhere she goes. “It’s going to be on the Internet until I die.”

Major Tom: Astronaut Scott Kelly returned to Earth today after 340 days aboard the International Space Station. Doctors will compare him to his identical twin brother Mark to learn the effects of that much time in a gravity-free environment.

Broadcast News: CBS network boss Les Moonves told the Hollywood Reporter he loves the presidential race — not for it’s content, but for the money. “It may not be good for America, but it’s damn good for CBS,” he said. CBS and other networks are raking in money on campaign ads.

“Most of the ads are not about issues. They’re sort of like the debates,” Moonves said. “Man, who would have expected the ride we’re all having right now? … The money’s rolling in and this is fun.”

Tenure Denied: The president of Mt. St. Mary’s University in Maryland has resigned in a controversy over his declaration that struggling freshmen should be drowned like excess bunnies. University President Simon Newman was accurately quoted in the student newspaper saying to a professor, “This is hard for you because you think of the students as cuddly bunnies, but you can’t. You just have to drown the bunnies.”

In the end he drowned himself.

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