The Trumpster Fire: The Trump administration has given Canada 90 days to sign on to a revised North American Free Trade Agreement or be left out.

“Today the president notified the Congress of his intent to sign a trade agreement with Mexico — and Canada, if it is willing — 90 days from now,” Robert E. Lighthizer, the United States trade representative, said in a statement yesterday.

Of course, it’s not all that simple. Congress has to sign off on the deal and leaving out Canada would be politically impossible. Canada is the major export customer for 36 American states.

While Trump plays the trade bully, the Russia mess continues to puddle around his feet.

American lobbyist Sam Patten yesterday pleaded guilty to failure to register as a foreign agent when he brokered access to the Trump inauguration for pro-Russian Ukrainian politicians seeking favor with the new administration.

Patten, agreed to cooperate with federal prosecutors. His case is not a product of the Special Counsel Russia investigation, but he’s adding his voice to the growing group of people testifying against the Trump regime.

She Started It: President Trump’s lawyers have asked New York to dismiss its lawsuit against the Trump Foundation because they say former New York Attorney General Schneiderman said disparaging things about Trump and didn’t do a similar investigation into the Clinton Foundation.

The AG’s office has accused the Trump Foundation of self-dealing … serving the Trumps instead of just charitable causes. But here’s the hitch in the Trump complaint. Schneiderman resigned his office before the Trump suit was filed, and whether Hillary Clinton did anything wrong has nothing to do with it.

Pennywise: President Trump, who has driven a deficit growth in the trillions through tax cuts and increased defense spending, earlier this week cancelled the 2.1 percent pay raise scheduled for federal employees in January. Trump acted under a clause in federal law that allows him to act in case of “national emergency.”

Los Angeles Times columnist Michael Hiltzik writes that, “For comparison’s sake, the tax cut enacted by congressional Republicans and signed by Trump in December is estimated to cost more than $1.5 trillion over 10 years. That’s $150 billion per year. If you’re keeping track, the tax cut will cost 30 times as much as the pay raise. Did you hear Trump grouse that the tax cut was coming at a time of ‘national emergency’ and therefore should be zeroed out?”

Aretha: While honors for the late Sen. John McCain have dominated the news, soul queen Aretha Franklin was ushered to her grave yesterday by eight hours of testimonials to her greatness by the likes of Bill Clinton, Stevie Wonder, Smokey Robinson, the Rev. Jesse Jackson, Louis Farrakhan, and basketball star Isiah Thomas.

John McCain has been spoken of as a man of physical and political courage who stood up for America and its values. He was. But Aretha Franklin, through her music and off-mic influence, may have done more to change America and advance its ideals than any politician. Simply by being a great singer who appealed to everyone, she broke racial walls and made America more American than just about anyone.

Sisters: Serena Williams took only 71 minutes to take out her older sister Venus 6-1, 6-2 at the US Open. The sisters have played each other 30 times and Serena has won 18.

Gridiron Blues: The principal of the Healdsburg High School in the middle of the California wine country has cancelled the remainder of his football team’s schedule just two games into the season.

It’s not because of heat or wildfire. Only 18 players came out for the team this fall and Healdsburg was outscored 102-0 in its first two games. Then six players left the team and the remaining players voted 7-4 to retire to the locker room for the season.

Obviously the coach just didn’t shout enough.

Attack of the Killer Scooters: Doctors and hospitals in Memphis have noticed an increase in patients who’ve fallen off electric scooters since the arrival of Bird rental scooters in town. Scooters are also piled in heaps on the walkways and grass in Venice and Santa Monica, Calif.

Dockless electric rental scooters are the new big thing in the disruption of urban transportation and they are causing headaches as well as ankle breaks.

The scooters are activated with a cellphone app that locates a nearby scooter and turns it on. The problem with the dockless system is that users just drop them wherever they are when they’re done. Riders are weaving through crowds, ignoring traffic rules, then dumping their wheels in walkways.

The scooter companies are already operating in 65 cities and, like Uber cars, they arrived in some places without permission. The Holy Grail for the scooter companies is to get into New York.

Part of the revolution is to act first and ask forgiveness later because there’s a lot of money in it. Bird, based in Santa Monica, doubled its valuation to $2 billion in just four months. Lime, which also rents bicycles, was valued at $1.1 billion  just 18 months after it launched.

The scooters are invading. In Baltimore, a woman complained in a letter to the editor, “During the War of 1812, Baltimore held off the British fleet at the Inner Harbor. Today, Baltimore can’t hold off a fleet of electric scooters on Pratt Street.”

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